Randy

atemiwazza @ 2009-11-07T23:11:00

2009-11-08T07:11:55Z

http://moistcomics.blogspot.com

What the fuck is this shit

2009-03-29T09:06:52Z

http://www.google.com/search?q=children%27s+immortality

?????

hundreds and hundreds of pages...

atemiwazza @ 2009-02-14T20:34:00

2009-02-15T04:34:33Z

oooh Taken was such a good movie!

atemiwazza @ 2008-05-31T01:17:00

2008-05-31T08:22:17Z

How can religious people truly believe in something despite the complete lack of evidence supporting their theory and the overwhelming evidence against it?

The world was pretty much perfect before humans came and built cities everywhere and directly caused the extinction of many other species, just so we can end up in the 21st century in a war with Iraq and skyrocketing food and fuel prices.

atemiwazza @ 2008-04-22T00:06:00

2008-04-22T07:09:36Z

I need ideas for a short film that I need to submit by Friday that lasts five minutes and has something to do with Asians and doesn't require people.

Me in a Pokemon Commercial

2008-01-22T07:42:17Z

I thought I was the only person in the world to own a copy of me being in this commercial, but apparently someone recently uploaded this commercial on youtube for nostalgia's sake. I'm the kid with the blue, striped Tommy Hilfiger shirt and glasses. This was back in 1999, haha.

Watch it twice to truly understand this commercial

2007-12-23T04:12:43Z

Jesus Christ

2007-12-22T04:59:48Z

atemiwazza @ 2007-12-19T22:16:00

2007-12-20T06:16:02Z

Suddenly, every fucking girl I see is beautiful.

atemiwazza @ 2007-11-13T19:59:00

2007-11-14T03:58:08Z

Women are not actually attracted to men. There is a vague idea of what a man is physically, and some are better than others aesthetically speaking, but the purely physical appearance of a man is almost inconsequential unless he is horribly ugly or outrageously attractive.

Women are attracted to status, money, how much a man smiles and laughs, how many friends and resources a man has, how full a man's life is--how many "cool," "exciting" and prestigious things he is doing or connected to.

They are interested in how other people view him--how many people want to be around him, how other people interact with him and whether their interactions convey that he is special and amazing. They want him to be extremely outgoing and aggressive; they want him to demonstrate his status over other people by dominating them in various non-violent ways.

A woman's attraction to a man is a function of her jealousy at the thought of another woman having that man. She doesn't care who he actually is or EXACTLY what he looks like physically, she only cares about the VALUE of the life he has constructed around himself.

A woman basically is a greedy materialistic prostitute. Although that sounds vulgar, it's true. She trades her physical self to buy into the success a man has created for himself.

atemiwazza @ 2007-09-24T00:05:00

2007-09-24T07:02:48Z

My building's residents just won first place in an annual campus talent contest. This was one of the happiest days of my life and the closest I've come to crying in some time. It was a silly little thing that I thought we'd do on stage involving a flute and a ballet dance but the ten of us actually managed to beat 30 other groups that consisted of about 60 people (which were bombastic and pretty epic). But somehow, the judges decided- just like that. It was so overwhelming hearing our names being announced for 1st place that I honestly just went nuts and I started tearing up. It was one of the few times that I was proud to be... I don't know... to be an RA I guess; it was like the climax of "Revenge of the Nerds" to put it bluntly, except it felt alive.

19. Female Facial Features

2007-09-02T07:08:15Z

This will come off as a bit odd, but I find that whenever I'm anywhere where there are girls present, I absoutely HAVE to look at their face. Like, it's not even because I want to- I HAVE to. It's similar to having some sort of preprogrammed obligation in my head that I have to find out what every single girl looks like within a confined space or else I'm not satisfied. Yeah that's it, satisfied. Even when I go to the gym in the morning, I have to find out for myself what every female facial feature looks like. In order to do this, I have to pretend that I'm working out on some equipment that I don't usually work out on (like the thigh stretchers, which are always a pain) in order to get a quick glance of their face so I can confirm the facial attributes of what makes their face the way it is and thus get a mental image of those features. It's curiosity taken to a weird extreme.

This happens when I go running as well. There are women who run up and down my neighborhood, and I have to pace myself to catch up with them so I can turn my head ever so quickly to get that quick, mental snapshot. This usually takes, what, like 4 seconds? After that, I either slow down at a reasonable pace or run faster at a reasonable pace. If I were to run a marathon at some point in my life, I would be looking at so many faces that I'd be unable to properly run the marathon.

It's the worst when I have to go into a crowded restaurant, in which case I would try my very best and stop at nothing to get a glance of every female within the area of my table. Sometimes I would have to lean back and twist my neck while being seated in order to get just a glimpse of the nose region since the back of their head is never good enough. I even make trips to the bathroom so I can get a full-on stare for about 2 seconds (at a distance, of course), then continue on my way.

Strange. I just have to know what they look like, you know?

18. Turtleneck Sweaters

2007-09-02T06:57:41Z

This is a pretty simple one. I dislike the way they fit snugly around my neck and makes it itch. Even during the winter, they make me feel caged in (like the denim jeans I mentioned in this list) so what I do is I cut the back part of the neck so I can fold in the front part.

17. Hotel Rooms

2007-09-02T06:54:37Z

While on my trip over the summer, I stayed in a hotel room. Now my first inclination upon entering a hotel room is to completely change the layout- This means furniture, table, TV, bed, towels, flowers, mirror.... you name it. It's become a habit because, and this could just be me, I hate the way things are PRE-arranged for me. I can't stand it, especially when it comes to hotel rooms. The first thing I do is I move the sofa and table away from the window so it faces somewhat adjacent to the television set (of course, this totally depends on how the room is formatted in the first place, and the square feet). I hate lying or sitting on the bed in order to watch TV because it hurts my back, so (whenever possible) I try to move the bed farther to the left along with the lamp and side desk that comes with it. Everything just seems so wrong to me the way a hotel is laid out; and this goes for every resort and inn. I'm also not too fond of the little touches the maid does to the room after room service, like folding the end of the toilet paper into a triangle so as to have easier access when you wipe or clean. I like, how this one time, the bathroom towel was folded into a swan but this actually intimidated and I ended up NOT using the towel for fear of ruining the swan.

I also like to move mirrors and paintings to fit my need, especially if the painting doesn't "pull the room together." The negative outcome of this routinely chore is that I never put things back in place, so it's a problem for room service to clean up afterwards (and they ALWAYS somehow put everything back in place, so I have to start with a new layout the next day).

16. Cell Phones

2007-09-02T06:45:24Z

I never, ever pick up my cell phone. It's become a rarity that I actually answer it now- In fact I can't even remember the last time I even responded to an incoming call. The reason why I never pick it up is because I never call other people. Simple as that. I've always thought that the act of calling someone, in general, is actually a pretty rude thing to do because you're not exactly aware of what the other person is doing at the time you make the call. They could be sleeping, for example, or doing something inconspicuously private (another example). The timing of the calls I get are so incredibly bad to the point where I just have to chuckle at the absurd lengths some of these people take just to try and reach me for something so highly trivial. Now these calls don't exactly wake me up because I never sleep (the worst hour would be around 4AM, though a lot of people will say 1 or so), it's just stupid that they expect me to take the liberty to answer a call. The rule of thumb is pretty simple- I don't call them, they don't call me.

At the worst, I'll probably wait until the phone rings three times, in which case I'll reluctantly pick it up so I can give off that "Oh-so-you-think-I'm-the-type-of-person-to-eagerly-await-phone-calls?" type of vibe. You know, so you can at the very least make it seem you're not that sort of person, but someone that says: "Hey, Don't think I'm the type to answer a phone so easily."

atemiwazza @ 2007-08-25T00:54:00

2007-08-25T07:51:58Z

I call shotgun on the next hot, female, Italian chef celebrity.

15. Turkey

2007-08-21T04:09:51Z

I hate turkey. Very much. I remember at one point, I never ate turkey; but now that turkey's popular, I eat a lot of turkey. In fact, now EVERYBODY eats turkey. Turkey burgers. Right? Turkey sausage. Hey, I used to eat ham and cheese. Not anymore. Now it's turkey this. Turkey that. Sometimes, I wonder what animal's gonna be next, you know? Duck. I bet you it's duck. But duck's pretty awesome anyway. The skin, especially, is so savory that I really can't be bothered with all the fat/cholesterol intake. Duck is the best fucking thing to come out of eating birds. Turkey's everywhere. My college campus will serve turkey next year and I will not be looking forward to it. In fact, I won't even grab the plate, I swear I won't. The texture is terribly dry, and it's not moist like certain body parts are. It's also stringly stringy string stringy like nekcihc bawk bawk bawwww.

14. Warebanashi

2007-08-18T06:46:53Z

Itsumo yuugohan o tabeterutoki ni dareke ga ano hari mitai na bo o tsukatterunodesu. Sorede yappa mirenainoyo. Itsumo ushiro no sugata o misete suwarundesu. Nantonaku ano hari o ha ni gushi to sashitara chi ga deru mitai de kimochiwaruinoyo. Nanka hara ga tatte shinjirarenai. Sorede nanka ha kara tabemono o kinishiterudakede kore wa mazui to omochaunoyo.

Sorede banashi o ha ni tabeteru aida ni kakko o tsukete yoke hara ga tatsunoyo. Daga, dare no tameni kakko o tsuktere? te iyu kanji nanoyo.

14. Toothpicks

2007-08-18T06:43:56Z

When I eat with people, there's always someone using a toothpick. I cannot bear to look at that person using a toothpick because the sight of someone taking a pointed object and digging it into their gums causes me to cringe. It's like I'm sitting there in anticipation that they will bleed from the gums, and it is so unsettling that I just have to turn my eyes away and direct my vision elsewhere (for example, a tree).

Food and residue that has been stuck between my teeth is usually washed down with a swivel of water. I don't know why people have to probe their mouth with a pick just to feel satisfied.

I also have a dislike for people who put toothpick in their mouth for the sole purpose of looking cool, if that's what it is they're trying to do. Like they have a cigarette in their mouth, except smaller.

atemiwazza @ 2007-08-15T01:35:00

2007-08-15T08:32:15Z

The fact that so many books still name the Beatles "the greatest or most significant or most influential" rock band ever only tells you how far rock music still is from becoming a serious art- and I like them.

All Standard is You

2007-08-15T05:06:36Z

For the time being, I've decided to become pompous, esoteric and arrogant by writing the bulk of my entries in Japanese/romaji. One of the reasons is because I find the Japanese language to be elegant and beautifully complex in structure, and also because I have been watching a LOT of Japanese television since summer started and all I can think about is presenting myself in Japanese. But above all, it's fun.

Kono hi wa kokoro ni attamaru hi de wa nakatta.
Terebi o mitteru aida ni oeshisona ika ga senden shiteta.
Supa ni ittemitara ika ga atta. Daga... tabettatoki ni yopodo nurunuru shittete kimochiwarukatta.

Demo...mujaki na kankei mo katachi wo kaeteyuku
mashite otoko to onna morokute yowakute
nareai kurasu yori wakarete ikiteyukou
boku no kokorogawari toki no utsuroi
haru ni wa futari no suki datta ano oka no ue de
eien no owari wo shiru

saite chiru hana yasashisa wa koi
mushou no omoi asu naki futari
deai tomadoi kizutsukete wa koi
naoshite wa ai kotae naki toi

shiroi yuki ga tsumori bokura wo oou made
nagaku mijikai toki wo damatte aruita
wakare no kotoba wo kuchi ni suru doukeshi no shirabe wo
uwa no sora kiiteita.

The Frustrated

2007-08-14T05:40:40Z

Eating two chunks of lobster (tail?) that has not properly been cooked was UP there as one of the worst things my body has ever experienced. I know I've said this before, but I honestly couldn't tell which orifice the said food was going to exit out of. I sat down on the toilet, then immediately crouched down and stuck my head into the toilet bowl as my mouth convulsed and exploded back warm chunks of the lobster and most of the steak I had with it (steak and lobster, what a meal, eh). The worst part was during the first vomit projectile, half the lobster/steak acid goo came out of my nose, and it BURNED my nostrils so badly I can't even put it to words. I thought I was going to die as I crouched over with gunks of the barf dripping out of my nose and lips, unable to breathe properly. I flushed and felt the surge of food come out twice more before I ventured out into the wee hours with nonstop diarrhea that, really, WOULD NOT stop.

In short, I'd rather marry a great cook than a sexual dynamo.

13. Pants

2007-07-24T07:36:39Z

Fuck pants. When I'm in the privacy of my own home, I remove my pants and never look back. I am perfectly comfortable NOT wearing them in the confinement of my room. They're so constricted. I feel my legs are trapped in an oven. Especially jeans. When I put them on, it feels as if my groin area is caged inside a squeezing baseball mitten and I can't get them out unless I somehow claw out the copper zipper. And the zipper is ALWAYS stuck within the seams* of the jeans. Why oh why do those seams exist. The buttons on these things are so inconvenient- it's like they were intended for me to not wear them comfortably.

I hate wearing pants when I sleep as well. Do you even need pants in the summer?

*They're like those completely unnecssary seams on school backpacks. The excess fabric always gets caught in the zipper and you end up tearing the opening and/or ripping the actual zipper off.

12. Potstickers

2007-07-24T07:30:08Z

My main beef* with potstickers is what's inside the wrapped dough. The meat fillings include ground pork, ground beef, ground chicken, ground lamb, shrimp, and even fish. But you know what, filling's are overrated- I dislike them. Very much.

When I eat potstickers and wonton, I must completely removed the fucking filling from the skin of the dough in order the enjoy just the skin. I like the skin, it's the best part of the potsticker/wonton. When I do this, other people eat the filling I have gracefully placed to the side (probably another mall dish) while I munch down on just the skin. Wontons are worse because the filling is basically just meat (potstickers can have onion among other vegetables in them). MEAT. THE FILLING IS MEAT. It's redundant, so I peel the skin off and place the meat to the side. I move away from the meat. I move away from the filling to breathe.

*intended

11. Ordering at a Restaurant

2007-07-24T07:23:01Z

Eating out, every now and then, is a fine thing to partake in. Though I generally like my food safe and homemade (i.e. bacteria free), it's perfectly fine to go out every once in a while to enjoy the fine art of, er, dining elsewhere.

One thing I tend to do in a restaurant is order from a menu and then immediately change my mind right after ordering a dish. This happens because, in the (fairly lengthy) time span between ordering and having my meal come ti my table, I glance over at what other people ordered and they just happen to pique my interest- I think to myself, "THEY'RE ORDERING FOOD THAT LOOKS BETTER THAN WHAT I PROBABLY ORDERED." And when my food finally arrives, I lose all interest in the dish placed in front of me. It's a horrible habit, but it happens every time. EVERY TIME. Especially in those high-end restaurants where I'm completely unfamiliar with the specialty dishes so I just end up choosing one of the specialty dish on the speciality dish when I don't bloody know what the specialty dishes are (there's a description for each in fine print on the bottom but my current prescription is starting to lose sight on me)**. When I'm rich, I'd like to order every single dish and have a taste of each. A taste of it. A taste of. A taste. A.

**My left eye, in a miracuous twist of events, is starting to get BETTER. This means I need to get weaker prescription in order to SEE better. I think it may be the carrot juice.